"Master, save me!"

Matthew 14:29-31
He said, "Come ahead."
Jumping out of the boat, Peter walked on the water to Jesus. But when he looked down at the waves churning beneath his feet, he lost his nerve and started to sink. He cried, "Master, save me!"
Jesus didn't hesitate. He reached down and grabbed his hand. Then he said, "Faint-heart, what got into you?"

And then in a span of a few minutes a storm changes Peters whole day. And as I look at this passage there are a few things that I can learn. The first thing that I can learn is that we all have tough times in our lives and these tough times hit us like storms!

Even Peter hesitated… I have been walking through the last couple of days with a ton of things on my heart… I feel like the waves are churning beneath my feet…yet there is one thing I am neglecting to do and that is cry out “Master, save me!” I have come to the conclusion that I don’t have time…it hurts to much… I need to have my crap together before I bring it to God… Yeah I know that’s just not going to cut it!!

In the midst of the storm Peter cried out “Master, save me!”... And Jesus DID… NOT… HESITATE… What gives me the right to stand in the middle of churning waves and think that I can take it on myself, and to be honest I don’t even think that but something in my being is keeping me from crying out to my Master. What am I thinking… Why am I so guarded and scared that I will not stand before my Master and admit that I am scared and confused, overwhelmed with the weight of the world weighing down on my spirit. Is holding this all in really making me feel any better or proving something about my character?

I had the opportunity to go for a walk in the woods this weekend and in that brief time in the woods I took the time to look up… Do you know what I saw…I saw the world spinning around me. It did not stop because my friends baby just died…it did not stop because my boy friend was just in a bad motorcycle accident…it did not stop because my mom stopped talking to me…it did not stop because someone in the church has a problem with my leadership…it did not stop because I never get enough sleep…the bottom line here is that the world just keeps on spinning. Even though the weight of the world may be weighing me down to the point where I feel like I can’t move that indeed is not the case, because as I saw in the woods this weekend even though I may have churning waves under my feet the world just keeps spinning. I need to shout out with as much strength as possible “Master, save me!”

Just as Jesus said to Peter "Faint-heart, what got into you?" I feel that in my own way he is saying the same thing to me. “My dear child…what keeps you from entering into my presence?” And I would have to honestly answer “I DON’T KNOW…it could be fear Father…”

So as I finish my thoughts and this blog I think even though Peter was faint-hearted Jesus still reached out to him and I know that in my faint-heartedness I need to cry out “Master, save me!” and let Jesus grab hold of my hand.

So as I was thinking about what to blog about I honestly came up with nothing…because honestly I feel like I have so much going on that I don’t even know where to start. My world has gone from uncomplicated to complicated in just a few weeks… If this is Gods way of refining me in the fire he can take me out anytime now… From dealing with the past to pushing through the present these past couple of weeks can be summed up in one simple little word, HARD. When I think about how people say that God holds every tear that you cry part of me is thinking honestly God isn’t your container getting full yet… How can I take care of the past when I am having a hard time pushing through the present? I can not even put my finger on all the emotions I am feeling and when I try I end up falling to my knees with tears running down my face, and as of lately I have not even had time to fall to my knees my face just ends up resting on the steering wheel of the car with tears flowing out… Uncertain…I am…Confused… I am…Scarred… I am… Unconfident… I am… Unsure…I am…Doubtful… I am… Hesitant…I am …